Shelter
by queenconniebee
Summary: Rita is struggling with the aftermath of recent events concerning her ex-husband, and all Iain wants is to prove to her that she deserves his love, and her happiness.
1. Chapter 1

**I promise I am going to try and do some happy/fluffy fics in the future! I just think there's something so beautiful about writing abut the less happy things, and how other characters react to that. This Riain fic is based after everything that has happened with the Mark storyline, but I have taken it out of how it was played out in the actual programme, so for example Rita and Iain are living together. This is my first time at writing the Rita/Iain, I hope you enjoy it! Please review :) x**

 **As ever, I do not own Casualty, any of its characters or plots.**

* * *

She sat there on the sofa, knees hugged tightly to her chest, tears running down her face. Her head had gone black, and everything seemed frozen, suspended. The door opened and shut with a soft grating sound, but she didn't move or try to recover herself. She just waited for him to find her. She heard him drop his keys onto the stairs and shrug his jacket off, leaving it on the end of the bannister as he always did. He sauntered down the hall, intrigued by the absence of any clattering or music, any signs that she was even here. He came into the lounge, standing in shock for a brief moment on seeing her, before he moved quickly to kneel down on the floor in front of her. He placed his hands on her forearms, and he noticed how she seemed to shudder under his touch.

"It's okay, Reets I'm right here. Just breathe for me. Okay, just keep breathing, in... And out." He stroked her arms gently as he tried to coax her out of her frozen panic, making sure not to break eye contact. "I'm not going anywhere, okay?"

She closed her eyes at the sound of his voice, but tried to listen to him. She could hear her shaky, stuttering breaths, becoming longer and more drawn out as he continued to talk to her; directing her attention away from the blackness and to naming things in the room, where she was sat and what she could feel. She opened her eyes and looked into his, deep and brown and loving, and as her shoulders heaved and the sobs began to choke her, she felt his arms pull her down to him. She knelt in front of him, but he supported her body as it collapsed and convulsed with the force of the tears that came from her. He held her frame tightly to him, holding her head to his chest and caressing her head as he pressed gentle kisses into her hair. He could feel tears pricking at his eyes, something inside him seemed to break at seeing her like this.

"I... I can't..." She struggled to talk as her breaths and tears muddled together, she couldn't focus properly on what she was saying.

"Ssh, Reets it's okay. I'm not going anywhere. Just breathe, and help this pass, yeah?" He suspected this was a combination of a panic attack and just sheer emotion breaking forth, he would wait as long as it took for her to pass through the worst of it before he talked to her about anything other than her breathing. He knew she was terrified, and all he wanted was for her to able to focus on something, anything other than this.

It took a while, but Iain's words were starting to make more sense, as was how his arms felt holding her, sheltering her from the hurt and the pain that had been gradually smothering her over the last week. She became aware of just how tightly her fingers were gripping onto his shoulders, her knuckles were white.

"Iain... I'm, I'm so sorry..." She had pulled back from him, he could now see her face. God, she was beautiful, he thought. But she would never see that, Mark had damaged any sense of self worth and value that she might have had previously.

"Oi, none of that." She was now making effort herself to keep her breathing level, and he feel her shaking subsiding. They both sat there, on the floor in front of the sofa for some time, before he gently helped her up to her feet. He brought her close to him as they sat down, her feet drawn up to the side of her, nestling into him whilst he took her body in his arms and pressed kisses onto her head.

"Talk to me." He whispered softly into her hair, before taking one of her hands and tracing around her palm.

"I don't..." Her head stayed resting on his shoulder as she spoke. "I don't want you to think I can't cope." She spoke so quietly that he almost didn't hear her at all.

"Hey..." He tilted her head up so that he could look at her as he spoke. "I love you. You don't have to try to be perfect, because I love you. And I know that's what he said to you, but you listen to me, please. You are strong, you're so strong. And so brave. This... what happened just now, this isn't weakness." She could hear how his voice cracked, and she lowered her head against his hand.

"I don't want you to get hurt."

"Reets, I'm not going to, and neither are you. He's gone now. He isn't going to be coming back."

"Iain, you don't understand. I've now taken away everything, his baby, and his..." She struggled against the word 'fiancée', inhaling sharply as the vivid memories of her conversation with Fiona in Connie's office that day came rushing back to her.

"I told him Rita, I told him what would happen if he did. He isn't going to come back." He rubbed her shoulder reassuringly, and the tiniest flicker of a smile passed across her face, before it faded just as quickly as it had appeared.

"It's not that I don't trust you..."

"I know, I know it isn't that. It's okay." He sat up a bit straighter to face her, taking both of her hands now in his. She exhaled with a slight shudder, and he felt an overwhelming urge to wrap her up, away from all of the hurt and the pain that she had denied herself to share with another for so, so long. He had never felt such a strong responsibility, such a want to protect someone, as he did now.

"I promise you, I promise that it's going to get better. And do you know why? Because I know you can do this. And you have me, and we all know that's the biggest bonus you could get." He winked at her, moving his fingers over the palms of her hands and she gave a small laugh, rocking forwards slightly on her legs to kiss his cheek. He took her in his arms and brought her so that she sat on his knees, both legs still bent up on the sofa. Her hands went around his neck and she kissed him, his hands holding her tightly around her back and her waist. He sensed her shuffle closer towards him, and pulled away from her face, smiling at her.

"You..." He shook his head, still smiling, and she raised an eyebrow before tilting her head, arms still around his neck.

"What?"

"I don't know, I just..." He looked at her, all thoughts dissipating into nothing as he could only focus on the woman who sat here in front of him. "I love you so much." He grinned stupidly, and she hit him playfully before twisting his hair in her fingers and kissing him again, and again. He made her feel so loved, but it was genuine love. Not a love that was she was persuaded to believe in. She was in this and so was he, entirely.


	2. Chapter 2

"Mornin' you," he said sleepily as he rolled over and opened his eyes. She was already awake, covers bunched up to her chin with her small, blonde head peeking out over the top, watching him. He placed his arm on the pillow which her head barely reached, and moved slightly so that he could kiss her without her needing to move.

"You're learning." She smiled cheekily at him, and he grinned before rolling above her, hands placed either side of her cocooned form.

"Iain... Iain stop!" She was giggling, desperately wriggling underneath him but to no avail. He bent his head to kiss her neck, and then slumped over back onto his side, swinging his legs to the floor before reaching across to her and swiftly removing her from the bed. He picked her up whilst she was still tangled in the duvet, both of them laughing, her persistent requests to be put down ignored. He carried her down the stairs and through to the lounge, lowering her down onto the sofa where they had sat the night before.

"Cuppa tea?"

She tugged the duvet around her shoulders and looked up at him, before yawning and smiling at him.

"Go on, then. And some cornflakes, please." He rolled his eyes and she bit her lip, pulling at his top to bring him down to her. She moved her hand to the back of his neck and kissed him, before he cupped his hands to her cheeks and pulled away, giving them an affectionate tug before disappearing into the kitchen.

* * *

"Are you sure you don't want to take the day off?" He knew he would be fighting a losing battle, but he also knew that he had to at least attempt to convince her to take it easy. She had barely spoken a word whilst they walked, and noticed how tense and closed off she seemed to be. He swung their arms gently together, watching as she turned to look at him, eyebrow raised, just as he was expecting.

"Iain, I'm okay. I need to be in work, if I'm not then that's when it will get worse."

"At least talk to Charlie..."

"No, I'm not talking to anyone, and neither are you." She let go of his hand and crossed her arms across her body. The last thing she needed was people questioning her professional ability. He softly touched his hand to her elbow and she stopped walking, letting her arms fall down to her sides.

"Hey... Come here. I'm sorry, I'm not going to say anything to anyone." He stepped forward, closing the space between them and brought his arms around her, her head resting against his chest. "If you start feeling like it is too much..."

"It won't..."

"Reets, hear me out, please." She looked up at him, then sighed before dropping her head back down against him. He rubbed her shoulders as he talked, and felt her gradually begin to relax.

"Just come and find me. Or Zoe, she told me she was worried about you. Send me a text, and I'll be there as soon as I can." He kissed her head, and she took his hand before motioning for them to keep on walking.

"Thank you." He smiled, and squeezed her hand. She returned the gesture, and as they rounded the corner they saw Connie's Mercedes, her still sat inside, phone pressed to her ear and fingers pressed to her temples in frustration. A group of staggering women came into view, in a flurry of pink feathers and glittering streamers, followed by a small mass of boys and men in striped shirts, shouting and causing mayhem outside of the ED entrance. They saw her sit up and look over her steering wheel at the crowd, hanging up and dropping the phone into her bag on the passenger seat, before opening her car door and walking around to stand next to Rita.

"Oh bloody hell."

* * *

Three hours in, and he hadn't seen her once, not in resus, not even a hint of her dark blue uniform passing by reception or the nurses' station. He knew she would be cross with him for worrying, but her stubbornness was what worried him the most, today especially. As he wheeled a patient in through the doors, he glanced around to see if he could get Zoe's attention, letting Jez reel off the necessary conditions, numbers and figures. He had to admit, the boy was good with pressure, and was a welcome companion. He helped to move the patient from the board to the bed, before standing opposite Zoe as she examined his head to establish the severity of his cuts.

"Okay, we've got severe lacerations to the left side of the head and above the right eye. Robyn, can I get some TXA, quickly please."

"Zoe, have you seen Rita?" She looked up suddenly as he spoke, before shaking her head apologetically.

"I haven't, I can find Connie and ask her to..."

"No, thanks Zoe, I'll go." He signalled for Jez to help him take the trolley out of resus, before spotting Max and calling him over. "Max, mate I just need to run and do something quickly, mind helping Jez with this? Cheers." Before Max had a chance to reply, he headed in the direction of her office. Apologising as he knocked a stack of files out of Ethan's arms, he half walked, half jogged until he reached the door. He looked through the narrow pane of glass, and saw Charlie sat at the computer, but no sign of Rita. He leant against it, taking his phone out of his pocket to see no missed calls or texts from her. He sighed before moving away and walking through cubicles, listening to hear her voice. He didn't, and walked back through the ED to Connie's office. Again, he looked through the glass but to see an empty chair, which made him feel slightly more at ease. Rita was probably in a meeting; he hadn't seen Connie around either.

"Iain mate, we've got a shout!" He looked up to see Jez at the end of the corridor, and quickly followed him out of the hospital.

"You can drive." Iain opened the passenger door of the ambulance, Jez standing seemingly in shock.

"You serious?"

"Yeah, now get in." He fumbled with his belt before pulling his phone out of his pocket, typing a message and pressing send. Hopefully they could get back quickly and he would be able to talk to her and make sure that she was okay, no matter how cross it made her.


	3. Chapter 3

She sat on the roof, navy hoodie pulled on over her uniform, with her back against one of the higher walls; the one which looked out over the ED entrance. She reached her hands behind her head and took out her hair tie, shaking her hair loose, letting it catch in the wind and blow about her face. It was so peaceful, there was a little noise below but it was indistinguishable over the wind. She leant her head back against the cold, hard bricks, and closed her eyes. She had left a post-it on Connie's desk to tell her that she wouldn't be attending the meeting that morning, and her pager had not bleeped since so she presumed that either she was too stressed to care, or hadn't been back to her office since dropping her things off first thing. Her thoughts were interrupted as she heard the door to the roof bang shut in the wind, and she looked up to see a pair of black, glossy heels and a long, blue coat hugged tightly around the figure of the woman with whom right now, she had no wish to engage in any conversation with.

She walked over and to Rita's bewilderment sat down next to her, slipping her heels off and placing them upright on the floor beside her. She tucked her coat under her and curled her legs to the side of her in an attempt to cover her now bare feet.

"I saw you walking up the stairs after I came out of the boardroom. I went down to get my coat and came up, no one else knows." Rita looked at Connie and gave a slight smile, before tucking her knees further up to her chin and resting her head on them.

"I'll come back in a minute." She felt her phone vibrate, and took it out of her pocket, hands shaking from the cold, and smiled as she saw his name appear. She scrolled up the screen before switching it off and putting it back inside her hoodie.

"You should text him back, he'll be worrying." Rita turned her head to Connie again, taken aback. She wasn't going to discuss her personal matters with her, not after everything that had happened between them. Especially after what had happened with Fiona last week; she was surprised at Connie's lack of verbal attack over Mark's presence in the ED again. The memory of her threats, and the incident with him and Grace made her shudder.

"I'll be down in a minute, I just..." She brushed away the hair that was blowing across her face and tucked it behind her ear. "I just needed some space."

"I know." There was a long pause, before Rita sighed and decided to say what she knew they were both thinking.

"Why are you here?" She heard the other woman give a slight laugh, before shifting slightly to make herself more comfortable.

"I think, maybe I thought you were the problem, before. But none of it was your fault. I saw him last week, and I saw what he did to you, how he made you react. I'm not asking you to talk to me because I know you wouldn't, but I want you to know that it wasn't your fault. And maybe me saying that could help you to believe it." Rita felt tears prick at her eyes, and the way that Connie watched her, with such sincerity and concern, it made her feel as though she didn't need to pretend they weren't there. She let them fall, brushing them away as they inched down her cheeks.

They sat there in silence after that, until Connie's pager began to bleep repeatedly. She sighed before getting to her feet, one hand on the wall as she slipped her feet back into her heels, and then brushed her coat down before flicking her hair over her shoulder. She smiled sadly at the blonde woman who still sat on the floor, curled up against the bottom of the wall. She looked up briefly with a similar expression, watching as the shoes clicked quickly away, before hearing the door ease open and shut carefully.

* * *

She walked into the ambulance station, fifteen minutes later, with her hair still down and windswept. On seeing it empty, she felt her shoulders heave and her breathing become more erratic. She ran back into the ED, through reception and into Zoe, who dropped the patient notes she was carrying and took her by the shoulders, before guiding her away and into Connie's empty office.

"I need, I need to find Iain..." Zoe sat her down on the sofa, and wound the blinds down.

"I'll call him in as soon as he's back, Rita. You shouldn't even be here today, I don't know what he was thinking, I told him..."

"He told me not to come in Zoe, it's not his fault." She cut her off before she could continue, and Zoe sighed before sitting down next to her.

"Where have you been?"

"I was upstairs." Zoe looked pointedly at her, knowing full well that she had not been in the meeting that morning. "It's fine, Zoe I just needed some space."

"Where were you? Iain's been looking for you all morning, and I haven't seen you since handover." Rita sat with her hands under her legs, looking down at the carpet, contemplating whether to tell her about Connie or not.

"On the roof." She turned her head to see Zoe lean back into the sofa, eyes closed, one hand pushed up into her fringe. "For god's sake, will anyone actually trust me?" She stood up, and walked over to the door. "It's not like that! I thought you'd get it, Zoe. I thought you'd get that the last thing I want is to be treated like I can't look after myself. I can and I have done on my own, for longer than I've known you or Iain." She turned the handle and walked out of the office, down to the nurses' station. She was angry, and upset. She just wanted to get on, but she couldn't. It was the people, all of the people around her seemed to smother her, even the ones she didn't even know.

"Rita..." Zoe had caught up with her, and placed a hand on her arm. "I'm sorry. I am, and I won't say anything to Iain unless you want me to..." She stopped as she felt Rita turn away. She realised then that she had implied there was something for her to talk to Iain about.

"Leave it, Zoe. I can manage." She picked up a stack of notes, before Zoe promptly took them from her. "No. Go and wait in the ambulance station and calm down. Come back in half an hour."


	4. Chapter 4

Zoe met Iain as soon as he'd brought the patient out of the ambulance, and as he did his job she nodded, her heels clicking quickly as they passed through reception. She was anxious for him to find Rita as soon as possible, but knew that she needed to be as discreet as possible, for nobody would appreciate her drawing attention to their conversation. She slowed her pace as they reached the doors to resus, holding back as Iain brought up the rear and she quickly tugged at his shoulder. His head whipped around to look at her, a trademark look of puzzlement on his face.

"Rita." She then moved around him to go through the door, but before it closed behind her she jerked her hand in the direction of the exit. He stood there, unresponsive, before she mouthed at him before the door swung closed and blocked her from his view. Moments later it came to him, and he walked steadily through the ED before reaching the exit and running to the ambulance station.

* * *

He saw her sitting in his chair in his office, and he slowed to a jog as he approached it. He knew something wasn't quite right, he was sure that otherwise she would have answered his message, or she would be working and Zoe would not have acted like she did. He saw her look up suddenly as he turned the door handle, nearly knocking her mug onto the floor as her arm slipped across the desk in shock.

"Hey..." He stood behind her and wrapped one arm around her, using the other to push the mug further back onto the desk. She brought her arms up to her shoulders to hold his, leaning her head back against his chest as he bent down over her to kiss her head.

She noticed that he was a little breathless, and her stomach sank. "Zoe told you, didn't she." It wasn't a question, and she tilted her head upwards to look at him. On seeing the confusion pass across his face, she lowered her eyes and let go of his arms, pushing her fringe over her hands.

"She told me you would be in here... but that's not it, is it? What's happened, Reets?" He walked over to close the door, before sitting down on the edge of the desk, motioning for her to join him. "Hey, come here." She sighed, before easing herself up and standing between his legs, her hands resting on the smooth wooden surface, her eyes not meeting his.

"I thought I could do this." She whispered, and brought her head up to watch his eyes lower to hers, before she felt him take her hands from the desk and intertwine their fingers.

"You can do this. You just need to give it some time and know that there will be a few more days like today, before things become more comfortable."

"And what if that doesn't happen?"

"That's not going to..."

"Iain."

He saw the tears in her eyes and right there, in that moment, he realised that something had changed. Of course, he didn't expect her to always stay so strong despite everything that she had endured, yet she had always had a little hope that things would get better. Now this woman who stood in front of him, she had lost that hope for herself. He felt choked as an unfamiliar lump grew at the back of his throat, and he struggled to swallow it back.

"I can't do this."

"Yes, yes you can." His voice was breaking now, and he shook her slightly as he desperately tried to get through to her. She flinched and fought her way out of his arms, her eyes wide and piercing his, in shock and frozen disbelief.

"Reets I'm so sorry, I didn't... I didn't mean..."

"Get away from me." She spoke quickly, but still unable to turn her eyes away from him. He reached out to take her hand but she moved away, towards the door.

"I...I'm so sorry..." He wanted to hold her and tell her that he had never meant to scare her, or hurt her. He himself was terrified of how she seemed so lost and so helpless, all he wanted was to show her that he that he was going to help and be there for her, all the way through this. But he couldn't, he couldn't lose her now.

"I love you...Rita, please...I didn't, I didn't mean..."

"That's what he would say." She voice was level, and quiet, despite the tears that ran down her face.

"Please..."

"No, Iain."

"I am not Mark, Reets please, I could never... I just..."

"You just what."

"I got scared." Her hand was now on the door handle but something, she didn't know what, but something stopped her from pushing it down. "I'm here Rita, I'm not leaving, not like this. You can't stop living your life how you want because of him." He stepped towards her again, and saw her visibly press herself against the door to put as much distance between them as she could. He moved back, and saw her press the door handle down before turning back to him. She paused, words struggling to form against the thoughts that formed ahead of them, tumbling over and around each other, but only one which 'talked' to her clearly.

"You're just the same."

He saw her leave, and he was left standing there, her words reverberating around his head; over and over and over.


	5. Chapter 5

"Iain?" He turned around sharply to see Zoe, walking quickly over to him as he came through the ED entrance. She ran her hand through her fringe and pulled at her dress, seemingly nervous. "Did you find her?"

"Zoe... I..." He faltered, and she looked at him expectantly before her expression softened and she motioned for them to go back outside. She led him into the garden, and they sat down on one of the benches. There were a few people around, mainly relatives who absent-mindedly held cardboard takeaway coffees, or doctors from the wards upstairs dressed in burgundy or blue scrubs, who clutched phones to their ears and pagers in their hands. His elbows rested on his knees as his hands went to his face, and she placed a hand on his shoulder, sweeping her hair into place and biting her lip, turning around to check that none of their colleagues were around.

"She hates me." He brought his head up to turn to look at her, and she sighed before shaking her head.

"That's not true." As she spoke his head lowered again, and his feet shifted on the grass. "She loves you, and that isn't something that is going to change with this. She's going to need you."

"I shook her." He whispered, and he took some deep breaths before straightening himself to see Zoe's confusion.

"What do you mean 'shook her'?"

"I... I couldn't get through to her. It's like she's stopped fighting, Zoe."

"Oh, Iain..."

"I didn't mean... I would never hurt her." His voice began to break, and he fought again to swallow the lump in his throat as he remembered her eyes, her wide, scared eyes after he had touched her.

"I know." Zoe whispered, and she rubbed his back gently. "I know, and I think she knows that too..."

"She doesn't."

"Iain..."

"She doesn't know that. What that man did... What I did, I should never 've..."

"She will know. Okay, I promise you that Rita will know that you were scared, that you never had the intention to hurt her." He rubbed at his face, before clasping his hands in his lap and leaning back into the bench.

"I have to help her. But she doesn't trust me, Zoe I can't... I can't talk to her without scaring her. You didn't see her, when... When she left, when she left I couldn't even..."

"Where did she go?"

"She just left... You didn't see her come back in?" He watched her as she shook her head, trying to hide the worry that had come over her. He stood up, and scanned the area outside of the hospital, becoming increasingly fraught with panic as his thoughts screamed at him.

 _Why did you let her go?_

"We have got to find her. Now."

"Iain..."

"WHAT, ZOE?" People turned to watch them, and he hung his head, before bringing his hands to his face in frustration. "I'm sorry... I have, I have to find her..."

"Zoe? Iain?" They turned around to see Connie, struggling to run in her heels but, despite the situation, impressing Zoe with the effort. "Rita's in my office. She's shaken up... But she's okay. I thought, well I thought you should know, er... Considering." She looked at Iain, and saw the relief that came over him.

"Thank you, Connie..." Zoe spoke for him, and Connie gave a small nod in return as a gesture of acknowledgement before crossing her arms in front of her, in an attempt to shield herself from the wind that had begun to pick up.

"She was with me earlier, when you texted." Iain looked to Zoe, her head now lowered to the floor, flicking a discarded cigarette butt with the heel of her shoe.

"I couldn't find her, I came to your office..."

"We weren't in the office. You didn't tell him?" Zoe looked up at Connie in disbelief.

"I left it to Rita to..."

"She was on the roof. She's okay, I think she just needed some time..." She saw the anger cloud his eyes, and he turned to Zoe.

"You didn't think I needed to know this? Of course she wasn't going to tell me!"

"Iain..."

"SHE IS EVIDENTLY NOT OKAY!" He shouted, and Connie took him by the arm and led him from the garden, Zoe following. They stood now around the corner from the ED, on the pathway by the hedgerow.

"And I... What I did, Connie I need to see her." Zoe saw Connie about to question him, unaware of the incident in the ambulance station, and tapped her hand, signalling to hold back.

"Okay, well we can go now and if you let me and Connie see her first then we'll go from there. Alright, Iain I need you to try and stay calm." His shoulders heaved but he nodded, allowing them to walk in front of him. They walked through reception, the two women talking to each other quietly as he walked behind, ignoring the shouts from Jack at reception, following them to Connie's office.

"Connie..."

"Shit. Zoe, go and call security..."

They looked at him, and he stood a few steps from them, hands clenching and unclenching, his jaw tense.

"Iain, she's not there."

He looked at them both, before turning and running from the office and through a set of double doors, running up the first flight of stairs, and the next, and the next. He was all too aware of the minutes that passed by as he ran, the only sound being his footfalls, keys jangling and his short, sharp breaths. He jerked the fire door open, running out onto the roof, wind howling in his ears. He looked around, desperately searching for her but she wasn't there. He fell to his knees, sobbing, sobbing in anger, terror and fear but also in relief. He needed to find her, and hold her, do whatever he could to reassure her that he was going to protect her. He would fight to show her that.


	6. Chapter 6

"HEY! What is your problem?" She pushed the security guard out of the cubicle, closing the curtains behind her as she apologised profusely to the elderly woman who she had been helping Ethan to treat.

"Sorry, miss, I was told..."

"You were told what? This woman is ninety-four, you don't just go barging in like that..."

"No, I wasn't..."

"Well you did, now go. I doubt she's who you're looking for." She put her hands on her hips and glared at him, watching as he talked to a colleague on a handheld.

"She's fine, yes you can tell Mrs Beauchamp... Well no, she's right here with me now..." Rita felt her stomach turn as the realisation hit.

 _They were looking for you._

"I'm, I'm so sorry..."

"It's okay miss, they know you're here." He looked around awkwardly, not sure whether he was supposed to march the clinical nurse manager back into the clinical lead's office or not.

"I'll, um... I'll just..." She walked quickly away from him and towards Connie's office, almost head first into the two women who stood outside, talking to another security guard.

"Rita!" She saw Connie's hair whip around as Zoe said her name, and the man took this as his cue to leave. "My god, what did you think you were doing?"

"Ethan wanted a second opinion and you had gone..." She looked at Connie, who seemed to keep turning around to watch the stairs at the end of the corridor. "I felt fine and it wasn't like there was anyone else around..." She then trailed off as she saw him appear, his hair matted and his chest heaving, stopping as he saw her standing a few metres in front of him.

"Iain..." She didn't move either but stood, frozen. She could see him coming towards her, but only really registered this when she stumbled backwards into Zoe as he pulled her to him.

"Don't you... Don't you ever..." His breathing was ragged, and his words were unclear as he buried his head into her neck and held her. She stroked his back through his jacket, confused, but feeling safer and more at ease than she had felt in a while.

"I don't deserve you." She whispered, pulling back to curl her fingers into his hair and push it back into place.

"Don't you dare say that."

"I don't. Someone... Someone like me doesn't deserve someone like you." She felt his hands slacken around her waist and she hung her head, but he took her hand in his before looking behind her to see Connie.

"Can we use the office for a minute?"

"Of course, take as much time as you need." She gave a slight smile, before motioning for Zoe to follow her.

"You don't think..."

"I think they need some time, then maybe you should talk to Rita. I think some time off would be wise." They stopped and looked behind them to see the office door closing, and Connie watched as Zoe brought her hands to her forehead, pushing her fringe over her fingers.

"I should never have let her carry on treating him..."

"This isn't your fault." Zoe turned her head to look at Connie as she spoke, and smiled a small, grateful smile.

* * *

"Reets..." She was curled up into his side on the sofa, and as he stroked her hair he looked down at her. He shivered slightly, and she responded to this by curling her legs tighter, pressing her body further to his.

"I'm so sorry, Iain..."

"Hey, ssh. That's not your job, you have nothing to apologise for. I scared you."

"I shouldn't have reacted like I did, I knew you wouldn't..." He squeezed her hand gently, and she looked up at him before continuing. "I knew you wouldn't hurt me, it's just... I couldn't convince myself then that it was different." He kissed her head, and curled a lock of her hair around in his fingers.

"When you weren't in the office..."

"Iain..."

"Please, Rita." He had felt her stiffen, but she didn't move away from him. "I want you to talk to me."

"It's really not what you think."

"Connie said..."

"She was trying to help."

"What do you mean?"

"She... She said it wasn't my fault." He looked down at her, confused.

"Mark?"

"Mhm."

"She didn't say..."

"She wouldn't want people knowing that she had a heart." It had come out instinctively, but now it felt wrong. There was a new respect she had found for the woman, the criticism of her nature now seemed overly harsh. He noticed her pause, and he rubbed her shoulder gently.

"Did she find you?"

"No, well yes but not like that. I just needed a break and she followed me up, talked to me and left. I came down and ran into Zoe..." She trailed off, she didn't need to explain what happened after that. His shivers and matted hair revealed enough about what had happened during the time she had been in cubicles. "She presumed, you all did when you couldn't find me."

"Reets..."

"Iain you have got to trust me. Please. I realise I pushed myself too far today, but it is going to be okay. I am going to be okay."

"I was so scared." His voice wobbled slightly, and he took a deep breath in an attempt to steady it.

"There was no need to be."

"Will you take some time off? Even if it's just a week, I've got some holiday owed so we could maybe go away somewhere."

"I'd love that."

"Yeah?" He met her eyes and she smiled, a genuine smile that immediately brought one to his face too.

"I love you. I would never hurt you, I want you to be happy and safe and I want you to know..."

"I know." She whispered, and reached up to press her lips to his.


	7. Chapter 7

**I've really really enjoyed writing Rita/Iain, but I feel as though I'm running out of steam now with this fic. I don't want to carry on writing chapters that I'm not happy with and you don't enjoy, so this will be the last one. Thank you so much for all of the feedback and positivity, I really appreciate it, and hope you enjoy this update :) x**

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"Right, come on you." They walked out of the ED together, Iain nodding in thanks to Connie as they left. She had arranged for the two of them to take the next week off, including two weekends, and he knew that this was what Rita really needed. She needed some time away from the memories of the past few weeks, some time to herself to make sense of what had happened, away from the confusion and the stress that came with the nature of the job. They arrived back home twenty minutes later, he took her jacket from her and she went through to the kitchen, taking two mugs and putting the kettle on to boil.

"Iain?"

"Reets?" She saw his head come into view around the corner and she giggled, she couldn't see any of his body. "Come here?"

He moved to where she stood, her back against the kitchen surface. She reached up to kiss him, and he held her gently before pulling her more tightly to him so that she was stood practically on his feet. He rested his forehead against hers for a few moments before speaking, not willing to let go of her just yet.

"What was that for?" The button of the kettle popped, and steam began to cloud the air behind her.

"Thank you." She kissed him again, before pulling away and brushing her fringe from her eyes. He chuckled, and replaced her fingers with his, caressing her hair gently. "Thank you, for everything."

"You're going to be alright, Rita. I promise."

"I'll be more than alright, Mr Dean."

"Oh?"

"Because I've got you."

"Yeah, you have. And..."

"You're not going anywhere." She finished for him, looking up into his eyes and seeing in them a happiness, in knowing that she knew that this was it.

"Exactly." He spoke softly, and kissed her head before releasing her, and taking the kettle.

"I can..."

"You prefer my tea anyway. What is it you're always telling me? Oh yes, that _I_ have the knack. Go on you, find us some biscuits." He grinned as she opened the cupboard door above their heads, having to stand on her tiptoes, to search for the box that he knew he had replenished with custard creams only days ago. He watched as she pulled it down, and she turned to him, eyes lowered. He sighed in mock exasperation, before taking the box from her and rummaging at the back of the cupboard to find a fresh packet. "What're you like? You're an actual custard cream monster, Reets." She grinned at him and took the two mugs through to the living room and sat down, him following through seconds later.

"Open up."

"Iain, what..." She was silenced as he inserted a whole biscuit into her mouth, which she took in her hand and bit, smiling as she ate. She brought her feet up to the side of her and watched as he methodically dunked his biscuit in his drink, and rolled her eyes.

"You're _so_ sensible."

"That's me." He grinned and she hit him playfully, nearly knocking his tea over him.

"Oh god, I'm sorry..." She watched him as he just laughed and put one arm around her, placing his tea down in front of him on the table.

"Don't worry, I still love you, no matter how many custard creams you eat and forget to replace, or how many times you spill tea over me." He kissed her and she smiled again, reaching her hand down to table whilst he was distracted and taking another biscuit from the box. As she pulled away she quickly inserted it into his mouth, watching as his eyes widened in surprise, then laughing as he registered what was going on and ate it, crumbs scattering down his front.

"You know what..." He paused as he flicked the crumbs from his jumper onto the floor. "I think they might just taste better like that."

"Of course they do. That's how I like them."

"I know. And now I'm a convert."

"Well don't you go..."

"I'll buy my own packet, don't worry."

She laughed before leaning into his side again, her mood completely transformed from that morning. And it was down to him, it was all down to him. She owed him so much, but her being happy with him was all he wanted in return.

And now, after everything that had happened, she was pretty sure that they were going to be okay with that.


End file.
